What is your deepest fear? Could you answer that question “on demand” if you were asked?
You may have a sense of what several of your running fears are. Most likely, they are “conscious” fears. Example: “I have a fear of heights, airplanes, spiders, the dark, dogs, taking tests, interviewing etc.” Many of us have a fear of death or loosing a loved one. Most of us have a fear of the unknown or those things or situations that we cannot control.
It is possible that your deepest fear is something that you are not conscious of. There is a quote by Marianne Willamnson that was made famous by Nelson Mandela. It goes like this:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
For so many of us, this quote is poignantly true. We may stretch and expand beyond our comfort zone is a few areas in order to achieve our “baseline” quality of life. However, for most, once we achieve that baseline level of achievement ( job, spouse, children, house, car ) etc. we stop pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone. Our mode of operation becomes trying to “maintain” or “sustain” our lifestyle.
As a result of this phenomenon, most of us, if not ALL of us, are not living the lives we truly desire, and are not living up to our true potential. We think that we fear failure, however, in all probability, it is our success that we fear most.
In a Psychology Today article, Dr. David M. Allen, states that “Some patients who come to psychotherapy see themselves as big failures in life because they believe that they have not accomplished much. When the therapist digs deeper into their “failures,” it often turns out that they have not put much of an effort into succeeding at whatever it is they think they have not accomplished. When you ask why they did not go back to school to learn a new trade, look hard for the type of job they would like to have, audition for a play, go to places where they might meet a good mate, or whatever, they often say they did not do so because they were “afraid of failure.” Dr. Allen believes that these people are actually afraid of success, not failure.
Ironically, if you are genuinely afraid of something, you will do your best to avoid it. If you fear failure, then you would want to do anything to avoid it. In which case you have to not only make the effort, but persist when things do not seem to be going your way. These people are almost going out of their way to be failures.
So what do YOU fear the most? What are you “going out of your way to fail” at?
Your Vital Life Alignment Team would love to see you Succeed! We would love to see you actively reaching and striving for your goals.
We would love to see you living the life of your dreams! We have a few tried and true secrets that we would love to share with you! We invite you to go to our website and “join the movement” so that you can begin the adventure of living up to your full potential.
Here is today’s Vital Reset ReMINDer:
“Don’t make your fear of what could happen, make nothing happen.”
“I learned that courage wasn’t the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” Nelson Mandela
My very best wishes for an exceptional day and to your long and vital life.